Just flew back tonight from preaching twice yesterday at a REVIVAL in South Carolina at Sandbridge Baptist Church and it never gets old bringing the Word to the world. In the past two weeks, I have been blessed to visit Punta Cana, Dominican Republic / Miami, FL / Charleston, SC / Charlotte, NC and I preach this Sunday, November 8 in Baltimore, MD at 11 AM and then catch a 2 PM flight to Chattanooga, TN to preach that evening and then fly to Birmingham, AL on November 14-15 to preach at two pentecostal churches. While on the road some random thoughts come to mind and I would like to share this two part series on how to Respect and Recover from Rejection. I pray it will bless you and remember your situation is temporal but Salvation is ETERNAL!
It’s ironic how the words: Rejection and Dejection both have the word EJECT in them. Ejection as you know resembles the seat in a fighter plane that is “tossed or thrown out” before the plane crashes below. One flip side about being “ejected” in a plane is that at least you graduated off the ground before being dismissed. Sadly, so many shackled on the sidelines will never know the view from above. In basketball terms if you were “dejected” or REJECTED that means that your ball was not only blocked but usually followed up with some good old trash talk as to say: “Get that outta here and stay out!”
All of us can relate to rejection. For some it was being picked last for a game in recess back in elementary school. No one wants to be picked last but at one time or another all of us can relate to being by-passed for someone or something else. Some have endured a rejection in a relationship, some know the trauma of enduring a divorce or in job circles hearing the all too familiar words: “You are not qualified for this position.” Sometimes, I wonder what is worse - being not qualified or “over-qualified” for the job. Either way you still walk out without work and perhaps that is a polite way of saying “no thanks” or rejection.
The people that I admire most in life are not those that became a success but endured setbacks. Perseverance probably is my middle name and I would like to think that encouragement and evangelism are a close second, respectively. The above video highlights some classic cases of folks who failed forward. The blessings about falling is that if you can fall forward you are still progressing in a positive direction. We can learn much from a cat - notice that they almost always land on their feet. They know the art of how to BOUNCE BACK.
Boxers know firsthand what it means to dangle on the ropes and/or fall backwards. The key to being knocked down is to regroup and get UP. The METRO train by my house is a powerful force. It has the potential to carry hundreds of people from point A to B and back. However, after observing them closely for a couple years while working in Washington, DC I noticed something peculiar. The massive train always goes backwards briefly before moving foward.
QUESTION: How many times have you entered a fitness gym and after a week quit because your muscles were screaming, your body was burning and your spirit was barely breathing? Tempted to throw in the towel (your mind starts talking to you). This is too hard. It must not meant to be - I am going backwards not forward.
We must realize that sometimes in life we have to temporarily lose in order to win. Often we find ourselves going backwards before progressing forward. Consider the sling shot - The greater the resistance equates to the greatest DISTANCE! The adversity you face today just might be God preparing you for His VARSITY tomorrow! I have always said that those that have come the furthest go the farthest. Adversity is a hidden helper. Sometimes man’s rejection is God’s PROTECTION!
Plus, rejection never has to be permanent. Unless, you allow it. Some corporate leaders want to deny you initially just to see what you are made of. Major League Baseball coaches remind players NEVER to swing at the first pitch. My Uncle Bobby Shelton played three seasons with the Detroit Tigers organization in late 1960’s and was playing AAA with them in 1968-1969, the year they won the World Series. My cousin, Missy’s husband, Mike Butler was drafted by the California Angels in the early 1990’s after being the pitcher for NC State with a 96 mph fastball. Ironically, my Uncle Joe hit a 500 foot home run at old Griffith Stadium (home of Washington Senators) and the late, great Ted Williams at the game said that was one of the hardest hit balls he had ever seen. It’s AWESOME when the “big boys” brag on you.
Some rejection is good. Women with class will tell you that in dating, they are known to “reject” a man initially just to see how he handles criticism and will he have the courage and confidence to come back and try again. Because if he is too weak to handle a “no” now he will most likely buckle later in a long term relationship.
In closing, take heart and glean hope from the following initial failures who became lifelong leaders. Evangelist Billy Graham was thrown out of Bible college. Michael Jordan cut from varsity in high school before gaining a gold medal in Olympics and winning SIX championships in the NBA. “Chicken Soup for the Soul” books were rejected 134 times from publishers before selling $1.3 Billion and Hollywood actor Harrison Ford was initially fired from Columbia Pictures and was told: “You will never make it here.” Well, after playing Han Solo, Indiana Jones and portraying the President on “Air Force One” he did alright.
If you have been rejected - you may be on right track! The blessing about rejection is that it keeps us humble in the long run. Secondly, it makes us more determined. Third, it gives us a laser like focus that only “failing” can bring. Perhaps most important, when you succeed it is not to gloat and scream “look at me” but praise God - look what He did because we know now that had God not stepped in we still would have been left out (rejected). But the beauty is that with rejection comes RESPECT for those that endure, run your race, stay in the game and win or lose live with class, act like a champion and realize that “if God be for me - who can be against me?”
Air Jordan
It is wonderful when folks promote others and open doors and that is becoming more of a dying art these days. Please pray that scores are encouraged during my remarks and a special shout out to Randy for this exciting opportunity.
Prior to my junior high remarks I am going to grab 100 volunteers from the audience (nothing like participation) and strategically place them in ten rows of ten. Kids as you may know find their identity in crowds and clothes. One of their most prized possessions are their tennis shoes. Before the game I will have them give me their shoes. It never fails - at first they are reluctant to entrust me with their shoes. Why? Because their identity is tied to them.
From there I will make a huge pile of 100 pairs of shoes and stack them like a mini mountain. When I say “go” the kids race to find the person’s shoes behind them in line. Then the fun begins. They have to both wear and walk in their friend’s shoes and then hobble back and the next person goes and repeats the process. The first team to sit down indian style wins.
I wear a sized 12 and the first time I tried it myself I had to put on a girl’s size seven sandals. Fun! The students think it was just a game to kill time but then I hit them with a powerful point. Pastors, Coaches and leaders: PONDER THIS POINT:
The next time when the youth in your group at church comes into class late or with holes in his/her jeans or adorning less than the best tennis shoes too often we mock and make fun of them. Sadly, that person coming late may be raised in a broken home, raised by a grandmother trying to make ends meet and barely have enough food on the table. It is a miracle that they even make it to church much less only tad late.
The morale of the story is: “You will never know what its like to be someone else until you have walked in their shoes.” When I hit the students with that powerful point you can hear a pin drop. As adults we tend to disqualify folks whom are less than perfect. The last time I checked only One Man is perfect and that is Christ the Lord. Some folks have been broken financially, some emotionally, others socially. Some have endured a disease others battle depression and some were left to die after a failed marriage. However, we are never more like Christ when we give and when we forgive.
May we be slow to judge and quick to imitate Christ because when we mentally put ourselves in others shoes we just may be less critical and more like Christ. As a kid, I was blessed to have the $100 Air Jordans. Unfortunately, many did not. As a youth, I wanted to be like Mike - if I could be like Mike (Jordan). Today, more than ever as an adult my desire and daydream is to be like Christ - if I could be like Christ.
Elvis sang a classic song posted below called “Walk A Mile in My Shoes.” I love that line: “Before you abuse, criticize or accuse - walk a mile in my shoes.” His opening quote to that song was a poem he read and it is worth repeating:
“You never stood in that man shoes - or saw things through his eyes, or stood with helpless hands while the heart inside you dies. So help your brother along the way no matter where he starts. For the same God that made you, made him too, these men with broken hearts.”
Recently, one of my best friends learned he is going through a divorce. God laid on my heart to buy him a brand new pair of NIKE shoes. As the UHAUL van was pulling out with his earthly possessions in tow I handed him the new shoes. Touched but puzzled he asked: “Frank, what do I do with these?” I said: “Brother, I have been in your place you stand today. I want you to wear them every day and you will be reminded that God walks with you every step of the way.”
Looking back the thing you may be most embarrassed about becomes your greatest ministry to relate and bring hope and healing to those hurting. Oswald Chambers wrote: “The storms you go through were never intended for you but that you may relate to others and that will enable you to minister to them at their moment of pain.” Today, may we all walk and talk more like Christ and before you “abuse, criticize and accuse - walk a mile in my shoes.”
First, I would like to introduce to you the “GAME BREAKER”. Perhaps you know of one that comes to mind or you may have been one in your younger years on the playground of your youth. Regardless, if it was Michael Jordan jumping over Craig Ehlo and the rest of the Cleveland Cavaliers and hitting the game winning jumper at the buzzer with the whole world watching or San Francisco 49er great, Joe Montana finding Dwight Clark with “THE CATCH” in the back of the end-zone against the Dallas Cowboys at Candlestick Park en route to winning the Super Bowl or a “dark horse” coming out of nowhere to win the Kentucky Derby - all of these are attributes of “game breakers.” Just when you thought the game was over, the crowd could head home and the betters in Vegas were already mentally counting their cash; the “gamers” stepped up and the game turned on a dime and faster than a Ferrari with no brakes the game was completely changed right before your very eyes. Some fans elated and others absolutely crushed.
Contestant number two enters in and we have the “ROOM CHANGER”. Perhaps you have been at a party or event when one of them walk or waltz into the room and literally it feels that the air changes, the music fades and all eyes in the room are now fixed on someone at the other end of the room. Perhaps it is a powerful politician, a beauty queen, Hollywood icon or rock star equipped with electricity and/or an entourage that would make the late James Brown proud. You’ve seen it - the papparazi start chasing, flash bulbs begin popping, women begin screaming and the room seems hopping over to that individual. It is something to behold if you have never experienced it first hand.
Behind door number three we find the “IDENTITY TAKER”. These bandits are not restricted to race, religion or reality. They strike in various venues and a variety of wicked ways. Some strike senior citizens whom are easy prey while others hit at random. Some steal credit cards and forge someone’s signature and enjoy exotic vacations, lavish lifestyles at another’s expense and begin to jet set, live large and hurt many in the process while they wine and dine on someone else’s dime. These folks resemble leaches because they cling on to others and suck the lifeblood out of others. Instead of being laborious they are lazy and like a drug addict desire and demand a “quick fix” now opposed to working for it later. They are thieves and thugs and are a major menace to society. If you have ever had anyone steal your wallet, purse or credit cards it can be a nightmare not only to try to recoup the damages in dollars but cleaning up your credit is usually more of a problem and can take much longer to restore. Personally, these folks resemble people whom would buy another’s trophy at a yard sale and prominently display it on their top shelf as if they earned it. How you can really appreciate a win if you didn’t work for it, deserve it or achieve it while playing by the rules.
In closing, despite these three contestants, champions and cons we can only point to One Person Who is a “CALENDAR SNAPPER”. When Jordan, Joe Montana, Ali, Angela Jolie, Brad Pitt, Elvis Presley, Britney Spears, Tiger Woods, Hannah Montana, Ghandi, Mother Teresa, Oprah or Usher was “ushered” into this world - NONE of them snapped the calendar in half. When Jesus was born it went from B.C. (Before Christ) to A.D. (After Death). That is just one reason alone, why I am a Christian because Christ is the centerpiece of civilization. He was born to die for our sins. Clear and simple - end of story. Not any more complicated than that. We do a disservice when we add more to the Gospel.
Yes, I loved Jordan as much as anyone. For years, I wanted to “be like Mike.” Growing up, I played countless hours of hoops in rain, sleet and snow. Traveled all over to shoot ball in driveways, gymnasiums and arenas while daydreaming day and night about playing ball. Yes, it was great fun to watch Michael at the top of his game and you knew you had a chance with M.J. on your team despite how much the Bulls were down by and what little time may be remaining on the clock; but it’s a fact that Jordan missed just many jumpers at the buzzer than he made them! Yes, I love him because he wanted the ball even when the entire arena knew it was going to him but the truth is he was not perfect.
Arguably, no one could change the climate of a room like Elvis Presley at the zenith of his popularity but even the most handsome and gorgeous humans are made of flesh and that fades eventually. As immature, insecure and insensitive as those whom steal the identity of another the truth is you cannot ever find freedom or experience true peace and purpose unless you meet first hand, Jesus Christ , the Son of the Living God. The Carpenter from Galilee and the Messiah of the Universe. The answers in life are not found in the “stars” of Hollywood but the Son of Heaven.